Feb 192015
 

Shamelessly re-blogged from the comments section of IMDB for the movie The Hunted (1995), posted by ksjazzguitar on Sat Jun 26 2010.

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1. Ninja leaders and high priced call girls have really bad Japanese accents (which I’m sure has nothing to do with the fact that they are played by Chinese actors.)

2. If I kill Kinjo, I become his heir.

3. When fighting your ninja master for control of the clan, just raise your sword as high as you can and charge him – I’m sure he won’t think to step aside and slice you across the belly. After that fails, try it again – I’m sure he won’t slice you across the belly a second time.

4. Paul REALLY doesn’t like pachinko.

5. Little Japanese girls will happily get in a cab with a strange gaijin, as long as he’s nervous and bleeding from the neck (that’s how you know they are safe.)

6. A taxi driver in a major city doesn’t understand the word “train”, even though it has cognates in several European languages. It probably never gets mentioned in his line of work.

7. Takeda is impressed. No one has ever escaped the Makato, Racine has done it twice.

8. If you see half a dozen young men getting on a train with golf bags, they are probably ninja.

9. When ninja attack a train, they always color coordinate with the drapes. It’s just part of ninja etiquette.”


10. Takada REALLY hates poles in the dining car.

11. Takeda always waits until Mieko is ready before saving the innocent people, even thought they could have done this on their way back to the dining car.

12. When being attacked by ninja on a train, it’s safe to assume that they will only attack from the front of the train – they won’t think to have anyone at the back to prevent escape.”

13. If you damage the foot sensor on a train door, the door locks and can’t be opened from the other side – that’s just how they work.

14. Takeda doesn’t like guns.

15. When the police arrive on the scene of a sword massacre, and a man is standing there covered in blood and holding a sword, it’s OK to let him hold on to this dangerous weapon while you question him, as long as he seems like a good guy.

16. After a national tragedy like the train massacre, it’s OK to let a couple of your key witnesses go after some light questioning and confirming their identities. No need to take them down to the station for in depth interviews.

17. No one touches Takeda’s sword.

18. When ninja look for a sword master and the gaijin he is hiding, they never think to check in his island fortress and ancestral castle.”

19. Time does not die, only people.

20. The old drunk taught him something after all.

21. Takeda understands English well enough when he wants to.

22. When having a meeting with ninja, there is no need to guard the perimeter of your castle. It’s probably OK to not put any men on the wall and have most of your guys standing roughly in a circle facing inward. Hey, if you can’t trust a ninja, who can you trust?

23. You can sneak up on a ninja if he is hallucinating about the hooker he killed.

24. Kinjo could defeat his armed apprentice with his bare hands but can’t defeat a gaijin left-handed. Thank goodness Racine had the three months of training by the drunken blacksmith.

25. Once the sword is broken, the Makato are finished.

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